Dating for Widows and Widowers- Getting Over the Guilt

When it comes to dating after the loss of a long-time spouse there seem to be a perception of this activity being complicated. A lot of widows and widowers report feeling guilt about dating after their spouse is gone, even if it has been 10 or 20 years or more. The fact is that we need companionship and seeking it out has nothing to do with betraying your spouse.

So many people feel guilt, betrayal, and shame for wanting to start dating again after their husband or wife has passed. The answer to this might surprise you: stop feeling guilty, and you’re not betraying anyone. When we’re going through a loss like this, these feelings are usually normal. However, just because you want to go out and meet new people doesn’t mean that you are betraying anyone. Humans are social creatures and it’s in our nature to want to connect with other people.

Make friends first so that you can ease yourself into the scene of dating again. Find activities that you enjoy doing and people that enjoy doing them with you. Mostly, remember that your spouse would want you to be enjoying your life, even if that means finding companionship with someone else. You’re not replacing your husband or wife by dating again, which is hard for some people to realize. Consider dating a new chapter in your life where you can make new connections and share your time with new people without replacing anyone or feeling like you are doing something wrong. It’ll take time, but it can be done.